Gilbert Speaks on “The Narcissistic Gene”

20 Feb


This is a new addition to my Spiritual Musings in a Physical World. Do we create the Narcissist, better known as the Emotional Vampire, or is it in their genes?

What causes the self-centered personality? This is a straightforward question, but the answer is hard to come by. Do we create the Narcissist? Pathological narcissism may be the outcome of inherited traits. The personality is a combination of our genetic makeup and our experiences from early childhood. If this is true, then how can children brought up in the same family produce both normal and abnormal tendencies? What is to blame? Is it nature and nurture? How are Narcissists different from the regular person?


Narcissists are unable to follow the rule of “Responsible Equals Accountable.” Let us say for argument sake that a child has the narcissistic gene, but is brought up in a home where they are encouraged to be responsible for their actions, work well with others, and most importantly, have empathy for other members of the family. I think the words “responsible” and “accountable” should go hand in hand with the handling of the narcissistic child as they are taught to accept their actual potential, while learning to tolerate failure. The bigger problem is how to teach a narcissistic child empathy for others

Empathy: the ability to understand and share the feelings of another. It is the key element of emotional intelligence, the link between self and others. A narcissistic child lacks the capacity to feel compassion. Although having a narcissistic child sounds like a nightmare in the making, there is hope.


Narcissism is a form of sociopathy, but empathy can be taught to the narcissistic child if caught at a young age with psychotherapy, group therapy, and family therapy. Since the personality develops along with cognitive, social and language skills, it is imperative to start treatment in early childhood. The biggest mistake a parent can do is to ignore the symptoms. We not only deny the narcissistic child a chance to belong to a larger social order outside of the family, but by ignoring the symptoms…we are releasing another emotional vampire into the world…and, we have way too many as it is.

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